Needless to say, this pretty stupid, although I suppose any of us with a passing appreciation for the band should just thank our lucky stars they didn't pick Nic Cage. It's a classic case of Hollywood suits who think they can shove a square peg through a round hole to make a giant pile of money fall out the other side. Let's take a look at the qualifications an actor must possess to effectively play Mr. Cobain:
- Good at brooding.
- Can wear dirty sweaters.
- Ability to grow ratty facial hair.
- Angst.
"Doesn't sound too hard, does it?" say the dumbass Hollywood suits. "And who better to play a brooding, angsty character than one of the Twilight leads?"
Bullshit, I say. There is a big difference between Twilight pussy angst and Cobain's legit problems. It's Yankees-Nationals, Brady-JaMarcus, Hoops-New York, Stuart-Beck, Sookie-Bella.
And that last combination leads me to a grand resolution to this problem. The Hollywood suits obviously want to cash in on the vampire craze, hoping the use of one of said fad's main players will draw the youth crowd that would otherwise have no interest in the film. But Pattinson isn't the answer. If you need a vampire to play Cobain, there's really only one possibility:
Fuck yeah. Light my candles in a daze cuz I've found God.
Now back to Ms. Love. We should probably wait a few days for the meds to wear off and then ask her again if she still thinks this is a good idea. Supposedly she also thinks Scarlett Johansson should play her in the movie, an idea almost as laughable as sparkling Kurt Cobain. Really, there's only one Hollywood actress even remotely qualified to play Courtney Love:
I smell a blockbuster. Thank me later, Hollywood.
No comments:
Post a Comment